Oh Me Oh My

Friday, December 22, 2006


I recently went to KFC and got a macaroni salad with my greastastic chicken. After taking a few bites I thought they had given me one that had gone sour, and so I went up to exchange it. Turns out the new one she gave me as well as the original were made only a few hours ago. This can't be, I thought. KFC macaroni salad is forkful after forkful of artery-clogging yumminess, and this monstrosity before me tastes like rotting milk and salmon paste.

Upon further inquiry I learned that KFC has recently changed the recipe. I don't know if it is to conform to a "trans-fat free" culture, or they are just trying something new. What I do know is that the macaroni I once knew and loved has been replaced with what I imagine Miracle Whip that has been left in the sun would taste like....had it been stirred with a tampon.

Consider yourself warned.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Deep House Dish

When Rachel Dratch left SNL I said goodbye to Deep House Dish, one of my favourite recurring sketches. It was a talk show where the DJ Dynasty Handbag (played by Kenan Thompson) and his friend Tiara Zee (played by Rachel) would interview fictional dance music stars with names like "Trey Letraj" and "Drama Martinez" after they performed a bit of their latest song. Every time this sketch was on I was guaranteed to actually LOL at least once, especially since many of the spoof songs could almost pass as real dance music, so I was very sad to see it go.

That is until last week when it was back on. DJ Dynasty explains that Tiara Zee is no longer with us. (She's not dead, just dead to him, after posting a picture of him in his Dunkin Donuts uniform online) and has been replaced with T'shane, played by Andy Samberg. I was thrilled! Then the first performance by Beginnings Chang (in the clip above) solidified why I love SNL. When it's good, it's great!

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Mariah Christmas and a Happy New Year

“O Holy Night” is by far my favourite religious Christmas carol. You can’t beat “Carol of the Bells” if you have a choir, and if you’re going to go secular, “I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas” gives you that sweet cocoa in front a fireplace sense of false memory. Actually in my case it brings back the memory of singing it with my grade 4 class for the Christmas Pageant and falling off the back row stage (and taking Katrina Mihanovic with me)…good times.

As far as newer Christmas carols go though, the pickings are mostly slim. There’s the occasional cover that’s pretty good but originals like “Jingle Bell Rock” and “Felice Navidad” (the elevator music version) are the devil! But then there is that fantastic exception; in my opinion, the closest thing we have a to a classic modern Christmas carol: Mariah Carey’s “All I want for Christmas is You”. Who doesn’t like this song!? I’ll tell you who, people with tiny hearts and no spirit.

How can you hate an up-tempo Christmas song that asks, nay, demands you sing along to it…perhaps into your electric toothbrush? You can dance to it, you can jump around like an idiot to it, you can frolic in the snow to it, and if you’re like Mariah you can seduce a dude in a Santa costume to it.