Oh Me Oh My

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

To The Ladies

Purses. The obsession many of my female friends have with these blows my mind. I'd understand if women properly utilized these accessories for what they were designed for but almost none of them do. For many girls I know they are essentially leather stitched portable garbage bags.

I am always super-impressed by the girl whose purse is properly equipped: She whips out the tide-to-go when she notices a stain on your shirt. She carries a tote umbrella on cloudy days, and is the first person to offer gum after a meal. Sometimes it's almost uncanny how she's prepared for the most random thing. "Yuck" someone will exclaim, "my steak is so bland". She quietly reaches into her purse and pulls out a small bottle of HP sauce. I never question that girl's reasoning for carrying such an item, I simply look at her in awe.

This girl is a rare breed though. The majority of women both in my life and the ones I see at work have purses that resemble a waste paper basket. Ask for photo I.D. and she'll rummage through her glad bag of a purse and fish out a receipt for a can of coke she purchased in 2002, discount cards to stores that no longer exist: "Ooooh Eaton's loyalty card!", and maybe some movie stubs; then she'll look at you and state, "must be in my other purse".

How do you not take your wallet from one purse to another when you switch? Heaven forbid you should be without mascara or a magazine from 6 months ago. Who needs proof of your identity when you need to make space for a heel that broke off a pair of shoes you threw out in March. It's especially fun when you go dumpster diving in your purse and you have to sheepishly remove everything--displaying your tampons and birth control for the people in line behind you.

Three things should always be in your purse: your wallet with I.D., a pen, and gum/breathmints. Collectively these three things can fit in the tiniest of purses, not to mention the current trend in designers sacks. When you're debating what to fit in your purse next time, pack your license, a ballpoint, and some dentyne, and leave the kitchen sink at home. :)


At 3:26 p.m., Blogger Darek/Darciu/Dariusz said...

Another point: yes big purses are in but who are the one's modeling them? Models, TALL, LEAN, LONG models, in 4 inch heels and glasses big enough to cover half the face. With this look, the big purse looks sleek and chic and all that; on most girls, who average a height in the 5' to 5'5 range, are of normal weight and wear normal clothing when doing normal activites, the super big bag just brings about an image of little girls playing dress up in mommy's closet.


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