12 Days of X-Mas

Once again I think I was one of the only people in the dark about the "12 Days Of Christmas" Song. Did everyone else know it's a Christian allegory about the bible? At first I didn't want to believe it since a few of the days seem like a bit of a stretch: (nine ladies dancing is supposed to be the 9 fruit of the holy spirit!?) but with reflection I guess it makes sense that the four calling birds are the four gospels, and those 10 lords a-leaping are the 10 commandments, I just think it ruins a perfectly pointless jingle. Though there is no proof one way or another, some believe it was used to teach the catechism to children; meaning the gifts from "my true love" were actually from God.

To add to the poo-pooing, apparently the 12 days of Christmas begin on Christmas and end on January 5th or 6th or Epiphany. Isn't that kind of anti-climatic? The gifts are open, the food is eaten, the celebrations have been had, and NOW they decide to start--LAME!

Luckily the song has been saved by some hilarious holiday advertising; my favourite of which is the carollers singing in the Best Buy along the lines of:
"5 DeeeeVeeeDeeeeeeeeees, 4 computer games ,3 I-Pods, 2 plasma screens, and batteries"
Best Buy Employee: Don't you mean (singing): "and some batteries for my digital camera"
Carollers (still singing): No.

There is also the radio ad where a woman is coming into UPS for the third day in a row or something and after shipping the pear tree and the doves she is all frazzled trying to get the French hens in a box and when the employee notes that she is shipping the geese a bit early she's like, "WELL THEY'RE LAYING RIGHT NOW!". Priceless.

Carnival Cruise Lines are having a 12 days of Christmas sale and send me a new deal via e-mail every day for 12 days. Today's e-mail was hilarious if you try singing it:
"On the third day of Christmas Carnival gave to me...
Buy an interior stateroom and get an upgrade to an oceanview FREE!"
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!

I remember I used to think if I ever met someone awesome I would shower them with a gift every day for 12 days that sort of sounded like the gifts in the song:

Lorrrrd of the Riiiiiings
4 Collared Shirts
Some French bread
2 Tickets to the Doves
and a new fridge with some pears in it for free.

...I think It's clear why I've never implemented this plan.