Oh Me Oh My

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Lettuce, Tomato, Frim Fram Sauce

Homestyle Chicken Fillet--I spent the greater part of my evening shift dreaming of you. In Niagara you were so moist, so flavourful and in my drunken haze you were the greasy goodness I needed to help me fall into my regular evening coma. But then I had you again and you had changed. I knew from the first bite but I kept on, hoping I could find that connection again, but you were cold now; cold and passionless. Not only that but your "delicious creamy, tangy sauce" was not as I remembered it--it was as bitter as my feelings for you now, a lurid mix of DayQuil and hand cream with some chives to cover up your deception.

On the Wendy's website it says you will get me "excited about chicken again" but all I feel for you is emptiness. I know you got angry that i only called on you in the middle of the night when I was having a craving and needed to eat out, but we men are weak and you were so hot, and our times together were so satisfying. You remember those times don't you? Those were good times weren't they? We could have been something you and me--don't you see that Wendy's Homestyle Chicken Fillet? See that face? That was me! Hurt. betrayed. lost. hungry...not like it matters now. I just thought I'd say goodbye and tell you I want that $4.74 you owe me and my t-shirt you always wear to bed; wash it first, I don't want your stink on it.

I've moved on to the "Bacon Mushroom Melt". Supposed to be around for a "limited time" but I have a good feeling it'll all work out. I know I said that about McDonald's Pizza and KFC Chicken Fries but it's different this time...

.......IT IS!!!

SCREW YOU for judging me!


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